Well, in that case, Windows Update would be considered spyware.
Displayed more than a billion times a day globally, the blue screen of
death has a captive audience, with over 90 percent of the computer desktops
in the world. (An actual Microsoft quote).
I would be ashamed of myself to describe my work in that way.
Well, I always knew that IE was spyware but I am so glad to see Microsoft's
has finally come up with same conclusion. (This is in reference to Microsoft
Anti Spyware removing Internet Explorer from over a million Windows computers.
04/05.)
GOTTA LOVE MICROSOFT - NOT!!
Below are some email's forwarded to us, we will give the copyright holder
credit if I knew who they were. Normally these would be cute if they
did not in reality show serious problems with the Windows operating systems.
A quote from a James Bond movie that discribes Microsoft all too well....
"We have released out software with bugs in it. They will be forced to
upgrade forever."
Microsoft isn't "The Antichrist" there is no such thing in the Bible...
"antichrists" yes; but Damien has nothing on Billy boy! (B.W.)
(In reference to Microsoft's desire to keep Spyware going.) I like how
microsoft deals with the monsters they create.... It is like a giant 100
legged squid like beast the size of New York city. Instead of killing
or chaining down the beast they go out and trim one of its finger nails
so that finger nail will not leave a mark as it goes through on its rampage
through the world. (B.W.)
In Car Terms:
If Micro$oft built cars; General Motors would have no competitor.
If you had a Microsoft car it would...
Turn right for no reason at all. It would not matter if a street or
a building was there.
If would lock up the brakes at 70 MPH.
If would need to be restarted two or three times on every trip to anywhere
(like the store, shopping, etc.).
You would have bought it because it was pretty. The new Microsoft XP
car has the new AOL look.
Writing With Emotional Appeal
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to
become a great writer. When asked to define "great" he said, "I want to
write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react
to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl
in pain and anger!"
He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.
We are MICROSOFT. Resistance is futile. (for you Trekkies)
NEW KEYBOARD FROM MICROSOFT
Microsoft Corporation has just announced a new PC keyboard designed
specifically for Windows. Sources say a Macintosh variant is in the works.
In addition to the keys found on the standard keyboard, Microsoft's new
design adds several new keys which will make your Windows computing even
more fun! The final specs are not yet set, so please feel free to make
suggestions. The keys proposed so far are:
1) GPF key -- This key will instantly generate a General Protection
Fault when pressed. Microsoft representatives state that the purpose of
the GPF key is to save Windows users time by eliminating the need to run
an application in order to produce a General Protection Fault.
2) $$ key -- When this key is pressed, money is transferred automatically
from your bank account to Microsoft without the need for further action
or third party intervention.
3) ZD key -- This key was developed specifically for reviewers of Microsoft
products. When pressed it inserts random superlative adjectives in any
text which contains the words Microsoft or Windows within the file being
edited.
4) MS key -- This key runs a Microsoft commercial entitled "Computing
for Mindless Drones" in a 1" x 1" window.
5) FUD key -- Some thing to do with the display ... self explanatory.
6) Chicago key -- Generates do nothing loops for months at a time.
7) IBM key -- Searches your hard disk for operating systems or applications
by vendors other than Microsoft and deletes them. (Is very effective at
removing Netscape, Sun Java).
8) MSN Key -- With a single keystroke you will install and setup the
world's second slowest web access (AOL takes first place). And you thought
it was tough deleting all of the SetupMSN files from Win 98!
9) RW95 Key -- Stands for Re-install Windows 98. Because it's usually
a weekly ritual for most Win 98 users, why not make it easier?
10) FDISK Key -- Removes everything from your hardrive so you can spend
days reinstalling your favorite operating system and everything else. It
also saves Windows the trouble of corrupting your personal files.
Is Windows A Virus?
No, Windows is not a virus. Here's what viruses do:
1. They replicate quickly - okay, Windows does that.
2. Viruses use up valuable system resources, slowing down the system
as they do so - okay, Windows does that.
3. Viruses will, from time to time, trash your hard disk - okay, Windows
does that too.
4. Viruses are usually carried, unknown to the user, along with valuable
programs and systems. Sigh... Windows does that, too.
5. Viruses will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too
slow (see 2) and the user will buy new hardware. Yup, Windows does that,
too.
Until now it seems Windows is a virus but there are fundamental differences:
Viruses are well supported by their authors, are running on most systems,
their program code is fast, compact and efficient and they tend to become
more sophisticated as they mature.
So Windows is not a virus.
It's a bug.
I HATE MICRO$OFT!!!
All
pages on this website written by employees of ISC, © Copyright 1999-2015
by Butch Walker, all rights reserved.
Do
not copy or use in any way without written permission from Butch Walker.
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